Courage, Acceptance, and the Work Before Us

A Letter from One Mind CEO, Kathy Pike, PhD

More than fifty years ago, I was waiting my turn at box ball on my elementary school playground when I saw my third-grade teacher, Mrs. Rogers, walking toward me. I adored Mrs. Rogers, though by then I was in fourth grade and saw her only occasionally. She greeted me warmly and said she had found something she wanted to give me. She proceeded to fasten a silver bracelet around my right wrist.

It looked like the medical alert bracelets common in the 1960s. But instead of “allergic to penicillin,” it bore the Serenity Prayer:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

I felt special, startled, and a little confused. I didn’t know what to say besides thank you. She smiled and walked away.

Years later, I understood.

My mother had gone to the school to explain that our family was going through a very difficult time. My parents were separating in a community where divorce was rare and quietly judged. We felt marked, like Hester in The Scarlet Letter. I will never know whether the principal shared that news at a faculty meeting or spoke privately to the teachers who knew the Pike kids (and there were many of us). But I do know that Mrs. Rogers understood something about courage and acceptance.

When I started high school, I met her husband, Mr. Rogers, my ninth-grade algebra teacher. I came to understand that he was an active member of the 12-Step Program, living in recovery with several decades of sobriety. Courage and acceptance again. Shortly thereafter, my beloved Mrs. Rogers passed away from breast cancer. More courage. More acceptance.

So why does that memory come to mind now?

Recently, I was invited to the National Press Club, where Patrick J. Kennedy stood on stage to introduce HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. There may be no one alive today more Democratic in his DNA than Patrick. There may also be no one who speaks with more authority about the mental health and addiction crisis in our country.

In mental health, it is easy to say the work is bipartisan. The harder task is demonstrating it in our highly polarized society. And the reality is that we will not resolve deeply held differences in ideology overnight, maybe never. But we can decide whether mental health becomes collateral damage in that divide, or common ground despite it.

Patrick called out the elephant in the room. How could he stand on that stage and introduce someone with whom he shares so little politically? He answered his own question: because mental health priorities belong to every single one of us. Because both he and the Secretary know firsthand the pain and suffering mental illness and substance use can bring to a family. “We sit in the same rooms,” he said.

Anyone who has ever sat in those rooms understands. In recovery meetings across this country, the Serenity Prayer is recited with humility and hope.

As it pertains to mental health, we have a lot of work to do. The challenges before us are significant. Rates of anxiety, depression, and substance use remain high. Too many individuals encounter barriers to care. Too many families feel isolated. These are not Republican or Democratic problems. They are human problems.

I lost that silver bracelet long ago. But its message has stayed with me. The Serenity Prayer endures not because it resolves our differences, but because it sharpens our judgment. It does not demand unanimity; it calls for discernment and clarity about what we cannot change, what is ours to change, and the resolve to act.

If two cousins who stand with different political parties yet “sit in the same rooms” can affirm that mental health belongs to all of us, perhaps there are ways for each of us to do the same.

Our communities deserve nothing less.

Kathleen M. Pike, PhD
Chief Executive Officer, One Mind